In a world where “love” is often equated with butterflies, romance, or getting what you want, it’s easy for Catholic parents to feel overwhelmed. How do you teach your children what love really is – especially when culture defines it so differently? How do you live it in your home when you’re exhausted, misunderstood, or struggling yourself? Here we have a Catholic parent’s guide to teaching the true meaning of love.

Let’s start by getting clear on the basics:
Love isn’t a feeling. Love is a choice. A sacrifice. A person: Jesus Christ.

Love Is Willing the Good of the Other

St. Thomas Aquinas offers a powerful definition: “To love is to will the good of the other.” That means real love isn’t about how someone makes you feel. It’s about choosing what’s best for them – even when it costs you something.

In a family, this can look like:

• Giving your child your full attention when you’re distracted or tired
  
• Holding your tongue in an argument with your spouse
  
• Getting up with the baby again when you just fell asleep
  
• Saying no to what’s easy because you’re committed to what’s holy
  

Sacrificial love is the very heart of the Gospel. And it’s the only kind of love that truly satisfies.

Why Kids Need to See Sacrificial Love at Home

Our children are being shaped by stories every day on screens, in books, and through peers. If they only see love as convenience or emotional highs, they’ll struggle to build real relationships later in life.

As Catholic parents, we’re called to offer a different vision:

• One where love sometimes looks like serving instead of celebrating
  
• Where love chooses truth over popularity
  
• Where love is patient, even when it’s not reciprocated
  

Let your kids see love as hard and holy. Let them witness forgiveness, perseverance, and service – especially when it’s inconvenient. Let them know that the most heroic acts of love rarely go viral.

Living the Definition at Home

Here are three simple ways to teach the true meaning of love in your domestic church:

1. Tell Gospel Stories of Love
   Read about the Good Samaritan, the Prodigal Son’s father, or Christ on the cross. Make these stories part of your children’s imagination.
   
2. Talk About the “Hard Yes”
   When you or your child do something sacrificial (sharing a toy, waking up early for Mass, giving a sibling the last cookie), name it. Call it love. Let them associate love with action, not just sentiment.
   
3. Go to the Source
   When love feels impossible – when you’re burned out or bitter – go to Christ in the Eucharist. Receive Love Himself. He doesn’t ask you to manufacture it. He invites you to share in His.
   

Love isn’t something we figure out once. It’s something we grow into day by day – especially as parents. And when we center our homes around sacrificial love, we build families rooted not in fleeting emotion, but in eternal truth.

This February, as the world focuses on chocolates and cards, let’s remind our children, and ourselves, that real love looks like the Cross.